Wants.

update again soon ..

Heart sayings:
i want you to be more caring, i want you to shower me with love, i want you to be by my side, i want you to be the one that i can turn to, i want you to understand me more, i don't want you to leave me with my friends, i know im greedy, & i know i don't deserve that. but that's what i want.

im not finding trouble, im sorry.
Im sorry if i've not been giving you good attitudes,
Headache is killing me, Maybe like you say, i deserved it.


And lastly ... .... i want to say

27th July 2009, Monday
Enterprise was great, totally.
Other than the heels is killing me, its perfectly gooood (:
Took alot of photos and all, damn cooooooooool <3 ! (Its all in facebook)
Went for excel workshop after that.
It was damn boring luhs. The faci's hands work faster than he talked lahs.
He suppose to show us how should we use the excel. But instead, he done all the excel thing and started talking. So ridiculous. I didnt learnt much things though. Mr Aw bettter ;D !

28th July 2009, tuesday
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JIAQING (:
Module : Science - Biology
Its pretty fine ! Good day i suppose .
Cause i cant remember what i did on that day :x

29th July 2009, wednesday
Module : Communication
A bad day, totally.
Everyone is not feeling well, and not many turned up for school.
Took my temperature at the later part of the day, and realised that im actually running a fever ._. 38.6 degree celcius. How cool hurrrrr >< No wonder my head feels like its dropping on the floor lahs, ha!
Took a nap and ate panadol (Thanks JocieGf) before going for sports with the class.
Played soccer and basketball (: Though i looked so retarded whe playing. LOL.
Went back home with Jocie aftr that cause my head is exploding :X
- Thanks marcus for using cheering me up abit during classbreak
- Thanks everyone for concerning and asking about my condition
- Thanks ZiWei for providing me all the ways of dealing with fever. LOL! And also trying to 'threaten' me so that i have enough rest at home hurrr ;x HAHA!
- Thanks love for concerning toooooo.

30th July 2009, Thursday
Module : Mathematics
Met zolene at woodlands mrt station today.
Only Jieying, Daryl, Teresa and me came school today at first.
After at second meeting, Ron joined us (:
He damn LOL lah, before he come in class still text me to see if im in school. He said is because he wants to make sure he's not lonely in class. HAHAHAHAHA!
And realised that the five of us are from different group. So our ppt consists of five teams. Mr Aw is laughing like dontknow whattt >.<
Lesson ended pretty early today and Mr Aw went through all the problem very quickly as revision.
Maths new group.
Team 1 - Lesden Jieying Amin Ashwin Nadya
Team 2 - Michelle Jodie Ziwei Alexis Dee
Team 3 - Daryl Peishan Ida Jocie Chung
Team 4 - Teresa Iqbal Divya Lynn Priya
Team 5 - Ron Yujuan CX Aizat Wenting Erdie
Now blogging while waiting for SAGM to start ~

Thanks everyone for concerning about my sickness ;D
I will recover soon, i think (:

Yesterday was a good day overall .
Though at some unhappy things happening in the morningg . -Long story -
Well , after i managed to sneak out . Went to AmkHub to meet up with jocie and lesden .
Shopped around there and jocie tried on many many skirts o.o
Headed to orchard far east cause lesden wants t have a haircut .
And after visiting the salon , i fall sick .
Started to have flu and sore throat and blahh ;x So shit luhs !
Went off to meet ZhengJie at Cini .
Dinner then movieeee - Haunted in Conneticut .
Like finally i have the chance to watch this movie laaa . Its was goooooooooooooooooood :D
Thanks zhengjie for scaring me in btwn the movie hurrrr ._. Really freak out mansxz . LOL (:
After that headed back home :D

Enterprise tomorrow . And now i cant find all my clothes . Shit-ness .
And i dont have my damn phone with me . Arghhh .
worst still , i fallen sick =\

Ohyeah. People. Follow me on twitter. I update there very oftennnnn.
http://twitter.com/MichelleTLW ((:

Heading out to meet Jocie and Lesden and maybe Malcolm ltr over at AmkHub.

You never understand .. .. ..

爱 , 真的能说明一切吗 ?




that's all.

Wednesday, 22th July 2009
Happy Birthday Zolene :D ~
Birthday celebration with secondary friends.
- Jiaqing. Caifeng. Mingguan. Sokzhen. Wenhui. Ben. Roy. Ken. Boonwee. PriscillaWang.
Venue - Junction 8.



Thursday, 23th July 2009
Module: Maths
Topic: Whales
Three members in the team today. Had a tough time at first.
With the help of Mr Aw AGAIN, we manage to get it through and eventually problem statement solved :)
Overall, its pretty fine though. Haha.
After school, had celebration over at city hall for zolene's birthday but this time with poly friends - Lesden. Malcolm. CX. and supposingly Jocie suppose to join us, but some obstacles occurs ya.
Walked around, sat down and chatt.
Headed to Fish & Co for dinner.
Played some number games so not to waste food.
Because the one that lose have to finish some parts of the food and so on..
Went to the fountain of wealth. Dedicate songs and birthday wishes to zolene toooooo (:
Lovely view. I love it there mansxz :DD
Home to do RJ after that.

Friday, 24th July 2009
Module: Cognitive
Topic: Adopting a successful practice
Changed team for today. And having another change next week again ((:
We have a damn nice faci, she allow us to give her our preferrence of group members in RJ.
No plans after school.

Saturaday, 25th July 2009
Planning to head out with Jocie tomorrow in the afternoon to shop to look for clothes.
Meeting up with Zhengjie at night for movieeee. - The haunted in connecticut.
It have been quite some time ever since i met him ><
Good day tomorrow i hoped.


Misses.

Monday 20th July 2009

Module : Enterprise
Topic : What comes next ?
Relief facilitator : Jovin Hurry

Summary : Team members didn't change because Victor didn't come. Was quite happy at first all until the true colors of this relief faci showed up. Our group was indecisive about choosing a leader because noone wants to be one. So in the end, Mr Jovin have to pick for us. And UN fortunately, i'm choosen ._. and Lesden's the script.
At first, i thought it would be not be that bad because as long we all work together as one, there isn't a need to pick the leader. But however, i am wrong this time. Jovin is very demanding and he expects alot from the class and even more from the team leaders. And he is stressing the team leader every now and then, getting us to have meeting with him and he will passed the message to us. And we have to let our team members be clear of what are they suppose to do. We somewhat acts like a messenger btwn him and the rest of the class.
However, this is just the starting of everything. Things became worst and more stressful in the later of the day. He started off by introducing himself and all, and now the class have been imitating him and what he says. Damn LOL. After that, he listed his expectations of us, and expect us to meet the standard. And he claimed that he will makes things different as required by us. Therefore, he planned to do something different in the 3rd meeting(this is what victor always do too) But, what he requires us to do is far too much.
1st getting down to the library to find 3 resources and read everything after that link back to what we are learning.
2nd presenting the things we have gone through in the worksheet.
3rd presenting things that he showed us but its out of the problem statement context.
4th required to come up with a learning map about what we think career planning is. (this is so damn difficult cause we have to be very very creative)
We are only able to finish part of it and we have to present it. And in the third meeting, he introduced us with the very formal way of presenting. Which all of us are still very not used to it and dont like it. My team suppose to present at the third but the previous two teams said that they really need somemore time so in the end we went first. And i am the first one that have to go through the awkward way of presenting, so lost eh. But anyway, manage to get through it (: LOL. Well, this is roughly about all. But yea, of course there is alot more to it.
Mr Jovin can be very random tooooooooo.
Early in the day, he told me that i have beautiful fingernails painting.
Later in the day, when he realised that actually my nail polish for my both hands are different, he said : Did you run out of colour so you painted two different colours for your hands ?
I was so stunt when he said that lah, cause its like out of sudden when he is checking our team worksheet and PDT. Then after when i replied him, he continued saying : If its not running out of nail polish then must be i paint in the night. Because at night too dark, i cant see clearly so just painted it like that. So LOL lahhhh! I mean like, shouldnt he be chcking on the wkst and PDT instead of my nail polish ._. We laughed like pretty much though. And next victim Priya and lots more funny things. Hahaha!
The day ended and then before he left he said this : Michelle, i think you can manage pressure pretty well and can be push further. Hope to see you guys again. I was stunt. Energy were all drained by him already and yet he is telling me i still can stand more pressure. Rawrrrr.
I thought that over tooo, all until i saw the RJ question. Its damn demanding, have to write alot of things. And im like totally stuck. But when i remembered that he showed me what type of RJ our class produced and what type of RJ other class produced and he says that he wants a quality longggg RJ from us today. So i kept on writing and writing. And eventually, it became the longest RJ i have ever written so far. And i bet this will stay the record even in the later part of this year.


Tuesday, 21st July 2009
Module : Science
Topic : My parent and I (BIOLOGY)
Today's lesson is pretty fine. Get the gist of it and had quite some fun doing the powerpoint slides. Hahahahahhaa! Shouldnt elaborate cause i am too lazy to do so already. End offfff.


Tomorrow's ZOLENE birthday already ! Wooots !
Happy Birthday to her in advanceddddd x)


Ohman. Its a fcuking longgggggg post. Reminds me of my RJ for ystd :p HAHAHAHA!
- i wonder who will read everything -
Update again soonsxzxszxzsxzsxzxszxzxsz !
Don't pissed me off, i BITESXZSXZSXZSXZ XD HAHAHA.




Time's up. I've something to say still ..

Went outt with JocieGf today (: Shopping spree part I !
First stop : Amk Hub
Second stop : Orchard
Last stop : Bugis
Saw quite a few familiar faces. And well, continue shopping.
Good day today! And we bought similar stuff, more to go (:


Wonder when are we celebrating zolene's birthday .. ..

Okay, shall stop here. Update soon :D

I'm stepping out of the dark side. Move on, michelle!

Friday, 17th July 2009.
Cognitive and Problem Solving module.
Topic - Evaluate!
Relief facilitators - Andrea Chan.
People attended class - 15.
Relief facilitator, Andrea.C is NOT good at all.
Super demanding, and no sense of humor. Does not even follow with our class tempo.
Claims that she will extend the RJ submission timing till today 9pm.
But she didn't even set it at all, so now for those that haven't get their RJ done have to email to her. And hopefully she received it.
Lesson ended quite early. Stayed in school for awhile, and then headed to causeway point for movie.
Movie - Obsessed.
Timing - 5.35pm
With - JocieGf, Lesden, Malcolm and Roy.
Ratings - 3.5 out of 5

Bought tickets and walked arnd causeway point to slack.
After visiting minitoons, lesden and me went outt of the shop w/o Gf and malcolm noticing.
Hide and Seek (:
Roy came and had his lunch at Crystal Jade.
Then went for movieeeeee.
After movie, went to civic center for dinner.
Slack-ed around and all.
Gf went home, after that roy went off to drink.
Saw kengboon at the train station. Ha.
Chatted alot aft that, well, not supposed to mention it. (:
Supposed to meet up with Caifeng under my block. But in the end, didn't >.<

Sat, 18th July 2009.
Did my RJ.
Currently multitasking - Facebook. Twitter. Blogging. Msn. Sms. Listening to songs. Tv-ing.
Maybe heading outt to meet Ziwei later. Shall see my mood again.


And i'm able to go school on thursday already! Woots ~ That thing have been called off.
* Zolene birthday is coming up soon. Another celebration cominggggg. Gonna celebrate once with her together with Secondary school friends - Mingguan & co. And another time with poly friends - Lesden & co. And maybe more? Shall seeeee. HAHA.


* Thanks people for cheering me up when i'm down recently.
I'll be alrightt soon soon - Love you guys!

Waiting f that day to come, so i'll be down with my decision.
Considerations Criteria Consequences

Although our love is over, it remains.
I hope a little piece of you is still .. reserved for me.
A moment with my music, sweet and slow.
There are no wishes like a former lover's
That from the dark, repentant night must shine.
And so though we have both moved on to others, my best regards is to you.

Today is the first day .. .. ..

There's still decision to be made. Im thinking thru it very very carefully.
I dontwant to be hurt anyone anymore, vice versa.
But perhaps, till then ..
- Feelings of yours have fade
- You are able to stand and move on w/o my presence
Perhaps perhaps perhaps ...
though its so much unwanted for that to happen, but im just afraid.


* Im still searching for the smile i lost ~

Had been really moody these few days. Apologies people.
Have been in deep thoughts about something, a decision.
And now, things have aleady settled down, decision finalized.
But i am not myself anymore. I dont smile i dont joke i dont get crazy anymore.
All i did the whole day is to stone and stone and stone. Or perhaps, tearing silently.
I know i cant stay this way forever, i got to get over it. And smile like i always do.

- Is everything a mistake from the start ? -

* I will take this time to recover and as well think about IT ~
If you happen to see this, i would like to say.
I hope things will turned out smoothly for you in the future.
Look forward and forget those bad or maybe all memories that isn't worth.
Thankyou. And im sorry about everything.
All the best in everything everything. Take care lots.

I seriously regretted deleting all my text inbox.
Leaving me with no visible memories anymore.
I am still the same me having serious STM and hoping that i can have all the memories back is quite impossible, but i'm still trying. Because im not able to let go those memories, still.

I'm picking up the shattered pieces of myself, alone.
I'm trying to find the smile i used to have back, on my own.

Okay, everything is getting very emotional now.
I shall stop here before i drown myself with my own tears.
I will be back soon.

Will update more feelings soon.

Its time for me to update already.
Far too many things had just happened and i am so not going to blog about every single thing.
Read up lesden's or jocie's blog for birthday celebrations detail (:
And and and, this is so not going to be a long post. HAHA.
and photos will be uploaded next timeeee.
Its LESDEN's brithday celebration yesterday !
Met up with malcolm jocie lesden and lesden's friend - paul , shuying , wanxin.
Had our dinner dine at some pub-like places at douby ghaut.
Had fun. Totally (:


Im totally lost, in the world of myself.
I hate making decisons. It is so hurting. Either to myself or the other party.
Saying words that i don't want to say. Thinking about things that i don't want to think about.
Is this just life? Or just myself.
Sorry to those people that i hurt. From the bottom of my heart, i really don't meant to hurt, seriously.
Hereby, i seriously apologise for everything.

Is a relationship about only two person or more ?
I sometimes dont understand why problems btwn two person have to be announced and widespread to others. Getting them to give advices? And letting spead nonsense around to others? I find very ridiculous, very.
Stop all these nonsense people.

And yesterday, the 11072009.
I deleted my text message inbox.
Every single message was deleted. Not even one saved.
I dont know why i did that but ya.
For people who know me well knows that its very unlikely i will delete every message.
Because it brings me back to different different memories at different point of time.
But now, its all gone. Including all those memories.